True Confessions: Sloth

It sometimes amazes me how many different ways there are that Satan can take me hostage. (And of course I let him). And he is clever enough that often it is not outright temptation or sin that capture us, but rather, simple distractions. He doesn’t need us to get caught up in sin if we’re simply caught up in inconsequential and meaningless things. Those are just as effective in distancing me from God’s voice

Those of you who have lived with me over the years know that I am easily addicted to TV shows (remember the X Files pathology anyone?). I can plop myself down in front of the television and not get up for hours. I have always despised this behavior in myself, which is why I have been so glad in Lithuania that we don’t even have a TV at my apartment, and I’m generally much too busy to even bother with it. Well, when I got back from Ukraine last Monday, my roommate revealed that she had acquired all 5 seasons of a show called ‘24’ on DVD.

For those of you who haven’t seen it, I will just say, the show is just about as addictive as crack. And thus, this past week, instead of spending time doing what I know God wants me to – to write about my time in Ukraine, to think and pray, reflect – I watched two entire seasons of the show in a space of four days.

Emerging somewhat bleary-eyed from a coma-like state of entrancement last night, I began to think about that fact that sloth is one of the seven deadly sins, one which I can easily find myself mired in. Being back in Klaipeda this week, without many people around during the day to spend time with, with a big blank slate of an agenda most days, I have found it easier to run toward any distraction presented to me rather than to simply face being alone, just being with God and listening to Him. TV is medication, avoidance, a sinking down into a place of non-thinking so that I’m numb and passive. And so, in that sense, isn’t it just like a drug? No worse or better than alcohol or porn or whatever else people turn to to distract them from dealing with the facts of their everyday existence. It’s just that this is a more socially acceptable drug in Christian circles.

And these meaningless, inconsequential activities that occupy our time and thought-lives are exactly what Satan uses to keep me from hearing God, from seeking Him. And this is exactly why I find it is so important for me to write here, on the blog, and in other ways, because I know that when I write, I am paying attention to my life, not just allowing myself to be distracted and lulled to sleep. Knowing that I should be honest here is like a small form of accountability! So, thank you for being my confessors, even if I don’t know who you are or if you’re reading. Just by reading, you’re significant to me and to my walk with God.