I should know by now to expect these things. Really. Somehow all my journeys of the past year have included encounters and moments that tell me God is really and truly with me. This trip was no exception.
Things began on the trip to DIA on Sunday night, when I was nervous about having enough time at the airport to make it through customs and get dinner, buy a magazine, etc. I was whining to my brother-in-law as we moved slowly through the 1-25 traffic when I looked out the window and saw a sign tacked to a light pole that said, “Trust Jesus.” We got there in plenty of time!
Standing in line to check-in, I noticed a huge pile of boxes with pink stickers piled up near the group check-desk. Similarly pink-tagged backpacks hung from the shoulders of a group of about 15 people standing there too. I took a look at the mailing address affixed to the boxes and saw they were labeled, “Poprest, Romania, Arms of Love Ministry.” I assumed it was a church group, so I leaned over the rope and asked one of the women if they were going to Romania. “Yes,” she said, “we’re doing a Christian camp for orphans in this small village.” “I’m on my way to Christian camp in Ukraine!” I said, and then we chatted about the location of the village and I mentioned that I’d been in Romania 12 years ago. It was a short but encouraging conversation, and I wondered if I might get to sit by some of the group once on the plane.
After I got my boarding pass, I was disappointed to find I had middle seat since I was fully geared up to sleep as much as possible (this is my technique when going TO Europe, while I stay up coming back). Boarding the plane, I found my seat just a little before two girls slid in next to me and one of them said, “we’re friends and would like to sit together, do you want the window seat?” “Thank you so much!” I exclaimed, “what a blessing – I’m planning to sleep the whole trip!” Then I noticed the girl’s T-shirt, which said “Jesus Loves You,” in Romanian. “Are you guys with the Arms of Love group?” I asked unnecessarily. Of course, they were, and we introduced ourselves and launched into an eager conversation about what they’d be doing in Romania and what I do at LCC and will be doing in Ukraine.
The women, Kelda, 26, and Tika, 29, are both from different churches in Denver, but these churches have been sending teams for several years. Kelda is looking in to spending a longer term serving there, though she doesn’t have specific plans yet. As we talked and then cozied under our blankets to sleep, I knew I’d want to pray with them before we parted ways. At one point in half-sleep during the night, I heard them praying together for their ministry and the people they’d encounter.
It was easy, then, as we began our descent into London to turn to each other and pray over each other’s ministries. To say it was a divine encounter doesn’t do it justice. They both recognized the fact that God did not seat us together by accident, and when we got done praying over each other, they asked how they could specifically pray for my trip to Ukraine. I shared some of my concerns about not knowing my exact role on the team, how I don’t feel quite spiritually prepared, and how I don’t want to feel isolated (or isolate myself) as the only non-Russian speaker on the team.
At that point, Kelda spoke up and said, “I don’t know if this means anything to you, but as we were praying I felt I needed to say to you that you have a weary heart, and God can give you a new heart.”
I sort of stared at her.
Tika, who is a powerful pray-er, piped in, “let go of the past and look toward the future.”
“Does that mean anything to you?” asked Kelda.
“So much,” I said, “this past week I have really felt God leading me toward verses about His faithfulness, about His desire to do a new thing in my life.” I shared with them my desire to go into a new year at LCC with a truly renewed spirit, and how it has been hard for me at times to envision what this new year will look like.
“I get the feeling that you feel really alone,” said Tika, “why would that be?”
At this point I had tears in my eyes and began to share some of my struggles of the past year. I believe with all my heart that these women were given some words from the Holy Spirit to speak into my heart at that moment, as I was leaving family and friends and trying to muster the spiritual stamina to face another year away. God is always faithful to me. He is always faithful to me. He is always faithful.
When I was 10 years old and crying because I was leaving all my friends behind in Washington, on the first day at our new church, God gave me Kelli, who has now been my closet friend for 18 years.
When I was heading to England term, a nervous sophomore going with a bunch of upper-classmen, scared about who to room with, God gave me Kendra, who has been a close friend and fellow Kingdom worker in China since college.
When I was a junior in college working with A Christian Ministry in the National Parks in Rocky Mountain National Park, with two other girls who didn’t quite share my concerns for some of the, um, lifestyle choices of our co-workers, God gave me Kristen, at the ranch down the road, to pray with and sing Jennifer Knapp songs with at the top of our lungs every Sunday, renewing us both with spiritual strength for the week ahead. I go to visit Kristen, who has been a close friend since, in Spain next month.
When I was scared to death about moving to Hungary after college, unsure I’d find a kindred-spirit deep and passionate enough to confide in during the year of ministry and teaching with ESI, God gave me Annie – a fellow English-major who had lived a nearly identical life (still has!). Together we buoyed one another up through the stresses of that year and continue to write, even though we haven’t physically seen one another in five years! I go to visit her, on her current ministry assignment in France, at the beginning of August.
When I was new to Loveland, Colorado during my graduate school years, coming off the break-up of a long relationship and a tumultuous summer of ministry that left me emotionally wrecked, I walked alone into Faith Church because they had a young adult ministry advertised on a sign outside. There, God gave me Andrea, Marcie and Elyssa, who are beautiful women of prayer and encouragement who I’ll go to Urbana with in December.
When I was preparing to go to Lithuania, once again unsure that I would have a friend, knowing by now that community and encouragement are what sustain me in God’s work, knowing that I needed even just one person to pray with, knowing that Jesus sent the disciples out in twos… God gave me first, Anna, and then Giedre, and Christine, and Feruza, and Thor, and Jon, and Casey, and Jerilyn, and Jared, and Sarah, and Kim, and Janneke, and Sarah, and Nicole, and….
God has never, ever failed me. He knows what we need even before we ask him. He hears us when we pray, and desires to answer. This is truth, friends!
2 comments:
What an amazing story, Jen. I have tears in my eyes! I will continue to lift you up.
Amanda Pollard
Jennifer-
Mom and I were so blessed by your blog tonight. God does indeed provide even when we don't know to ask. Today we took the pickup and went to get our trees from Highland Nursery. They loaded the five ball-wrapped trees for the first load. These are big trees, and heavy. I looked at mom and said you and I cannot unload these (we were both secretly praying for some divine intervention.) But we drove from Greeley anyway. On the drive my phone rang and a guy called who had stopped by the house to ask if we needed any assistance with our dirt, landscaping, etc. The finish carpenter was there and had given him my number. I told him our IMMEDIATE situation and he said "Well don't strain your back. I'm heading your way with my front end loader and will be there in 5 minutes to unload and secure your trees." And he did. There's much more, but to say this was a God-sighting also wouldn't do it justice. It ranks right up there with the cigar-smoking angel during one of our many van breakdowns from your childhood. I found myself near tears as the truck was unloaded, and then thought of my heavenly Father just smiling at how he'd taken care of one of his not too bright kids.
Oh and thanks for the Father's Day card. It sits on my office desk and your words mean everything to me.
We love you Jen,
Many prayers
Dad
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